Your beliefs, like tobacco and obesity, can do more harm to you, than help.
“Bad” beliefs about yourself, expressed in words demeaning of you, weaken and damage you more than cigarette smoking and obesity would, if you were a smoker and over-eater. It makes no difference whether the demeaning words are spoken by yourself, in silent self-talk, or by another person, from the outside. As long as you express demeaning beliefs about yourself, you’re as powerless about the damage to you as the smoker and over-eater.
A recent dinner party included a man who had lost his job. It was a good job, well paid, in a nurturing environment. Now he answers phones at a call center. Not what you’d call a great career move. A couple of dinner guests talked about the things they’re doing with their lives, the dreams they’re pursuing. He joined their conversation with a truly bad belief about himself. He said, “I’m too old to land a great job again.”
With these words he not only joined the conversation, he ended it. What to say next? Even your best friends can’t help, if you’re continuously clipping your wings with demeaning beliefs about yourself.
It’s not the man’s age that’s doing him in, it’s his belief about being too old. With a more loving attitude he might have said, “I’m not sure how to get a great job at my age. Any ideas?” There would have been an outpouring of help. Instead of a show-stopper, he would have created a delightful experience for himself and the people around him.
Choose your beliefs wisely, lovingly. Your life depends on it.
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